nada mucho

The business of doughnuts...

File under: nada mucho

I try to avoid telling people about my dreams and I try to avoid hearing people's lengthy and confusing explanations about their dreams. I just think dreams don't translate well. In other words, you had to be there.

However, I woke up this morning in the middle of a dream that I thought was worth sharing. I won't go into the details because the details are boring, but right before I woke up, I saw a vision. There was a grainy gray and red image of me that was taken from an old photo from this time we went camping at our friend Pete's parents' camp. Under the image of me was a line of text. Here is my re-creation of what I saw in my dream.

I just had to share. This is probably not nearly as funny to anyone else as it is to me, but I went through the trouble to dig up the picture, scanning it, and doing some Photoshop magic.



File under: nada mucho

I mentioned that we went to Seabreeze last week and that it deserved its own post. It was a week night and we just wanted to go for a couple hours to enjoy the nice weather and get out for a bit. I sort of randomly suggested Greta play some game, and somehow she walked away with the "jumbo" prize (based on luck, not skill—or maybe she's a total ringer, I don't know) for that particular game. She picked out this big yellow dog, and we were enjoying the thrill of the win, when Pat plunked down $3 to play some other game. I thought he was nuts, but Pat said, "This is my game." Um, okay. (Pat worked a summer at Enchanted Forest, but I didn't know he had mastered a midway game!) About 30 seconds later, we were walking away with the biggest stuffed dog dressed in a banana costume I've ever seen.

It was sort of surreal. After they won their prizes, whenever they would go on rides, I had to stand there holding both of the giant stuffed animals, and it was so ridiculous. I kept getting heckled by strangers, and it was hilarious. (Maybe you had to be there.)

Sadly, I neglected to take a picture at the time, while we were at the park, so I had to try to re-create the scene in the back yard tonight and then use my (piss poor) Photoshop Skills to simulate the actual event.

Or maybe you prefer this more realistic one in front of the carousel.

And then we went to France.

Followed by a stop in Africa.

Then we went home.

Greta picked the "doggie in the banana outfit," that Pat won, and at first I was just like, "Hmm, dog in a banana costume," and then it dawned on me that it's Brian, the dog from Family Guy, from this. It's one of the few Family Guy episodes I've actually seen. And now there's a giant hommage to it is in my living room. Naturally.

In case you want a behind-the-scenes look at tonight's photoshoot, here you go!


I had an idea for the title, but then I forgot it

Lemme see here. Bullets for  you.

  • I sure used to like when more than one or two people left comments for a blog. Hint, hint. I know I haven't exactly been an avid blogger the last year or so, and the image to the left says something about wanting spring to come, but I'm ready for your tough love to end and for you guys to start commenting again. Are my updates really so boring? If so, tell me what you want to hear.
  • We celebrated more birthdays this past weekend than should be legal. Friday night, there was a birthday party for the woman Greta's day care is named after (who is no longer with us in this world but who is still worth celebrating), there was a two-banger kids' birthday at Powder Mills Park on Saturday, and there was another kiddo birthday party at the Y on Sunday. Oh me, oh my!
  • If you live under a rock and you didn't know, the great Ronnie James Dio passed away earlier this week. Apparently it's pretty well known that I have a special place for him and his music in my heart because multiple people contacted me to offer their condolences. If only he knew there was some nerdy mom in Rochester, NY, who so many people associated with him with. I don't know what the significance of that is, but it seemed notable to me. RIP, RJD. May you ride the peace.
  • I have a weird obsession about our old house, and I don't know why. I have a semi-recurring dream that I meet the women who bought the house, and we get into some sort of competition. I'm talkin' like a gym-class-type of relay race. It's so weird! In real life, we saw a former neighbor and she told us the new owners ripped out the hedges that had been in front of our old house. I always disliked the hedges, but in some weird way, I was sort of incensed when I found out they got rid of them. It had never occurred to me to take out the hedges! So they think they're better than us??  (Joking - sort of .) I didn't even really like that house. Can you imagine if I had? Why do I care?? When we told Greta they took out the hedges, she cried. I think the whole thing is very strange.
  • I decided I'm getting LASIK. I absolutely hate wearing glasses and contacts are even worse, and I hate squinting in the sun. I can feel new squinting-related wrinkles from the sun forming as I type this. After Pat's dicey LASIK experience and the fact that I am a major tightwad, I am shocked to be saying this. But I am getting LASIK. A friend of mine highly recommends one place in Rochester, but it's 'spensive. Like, twice as much as Pat's was, but it is MY EYES and perhaps you get what you pay for? Anyway, if you know of a good LASIK place in the ROC, let me know. I want to get it done within the next month or two. If you thought you would be funny and recommend the place Pat went to, let me stop you right here and let you know they closed up shop. SHOCKING, I know.
  • Ugh, I haven't taken a photo that hasn't been with my phone in ages. Sorry, bad Fran. I'll try to get better about that.

I could go on and on, but I won't. Leave a comment, damnit!

Do you ever feel like you're being haunted by a living person?

File under: nada mucho | rant

Rochester is a small city, and having lived here for-egad!-15 years, it's not uncommon to run into someone I know when I'm out and about. That is something I really love about Rochester, but every once in a while, like in the following account, it's just obnoxious.
To preface, in the early 2000s, I was on grand jury duty. Every other day for a month I had to show up at the Monroe County Courthouse and listen to cases that could potentially go to trial. Overall, it was an interesting experience, and I'm glad I got to take part in doing my civic duty. Blah, blah, blah. I was in a thankless job at the time and figured skipping 10 days out of the month while getting paid for it would be delightful. The first day, after being selected for jury duty, they took us into the room we would be spending quite a bit of time in for the next month. I shuffled to the back row and stuck my head in a book (figuratively speaking). If I learned nothing else about the judicial system, it was that things move extremely slowly. I also learned that jurors can be lumped into one of three categories: the people who quietly read and occasionally make small talk, the people who don't read and quietly sit there seemingly doing nothing, and the people who don't read and love to hear the sound of their own voices. As you can probably imagine, I was in the first category. I think I read more during jury duty than I did my entire senior year in college. Anyway, there was this guy in my row who I absolutely couldn't stand. Of course he was the third type of person. In addition to loving the sound of his own voice, he was also a busybody and super nosy. Those are three traits I absolutely can't stand. Basically, he was my nemesis. For the sake of this blog, we'll call him Hal.
During jury duty one afternoon, we were on a break between cases, and things started back up earlier than we had been told they would. Some jurors weren't in the room, but there were enough people to vote on things, so it was fine. We heard 5 very quick cases; meanwhile, the door was locked. Anyone who was outside was stuck outside. I was in the room to hear cases, but Hal wasn't. This brought me great joy because I knew he would be in a tizzy about it. After hearing the cases, the stragglers were let back inside. Hal was indeed in a tizzy, and he came back and blurted out to me, "What'd I miss?" I shrugged my shoulders and said, "Just a few cases." He said, "Let me see your papers." (We could keep track of notes on the cases in personal folders.) And I was like, "No!" But he was obsessed. He finally wore me down and I showed him my papers for the 5 cases because he promised me he just wanted to get the case names and what the votes were. But then he started reading my notes and wouldn't give them back to me! If you know me well, you know I was ON FIRE. In a word, it was ridiculous. Finally he gave them back. He and I simply did not get along. I just have no tolerance for people like that.
So imagine my dismay when, five or so years down the road, I found myself walking into a lab to have my blood drawn for tests to try to figure out why I wasn't getting pregnant...and Hal (apparently a phlebotomist) was behind the desk. He took my paperwork, looked through it, and asked, "Don't I know you from somewhere?" *Sigh* "Yes, we were on jury duty together. We sat in the same row," I said. He then took my blood. He was pretty much the last person on earth I wanted there at that moment.
What I didn't know at the time was that I was in fact pregnant then (yay!). When you're pregnant, you get your blood drawn a lot, and since that lab was literally next door to my OBGYN's office, I saw Hal a lot in the next 9 or so months. As time went by and I saw Hal in a professional capacity, I started to hate him less, and I will begrudgingly admit that it was sort of nice to see a familiar face and chat with him briefly while having blood drawn.
Fast forward to a couple years, and I went back to that lab with Greta so she could have blood drawn for her lead test. If you haven't had the pleasure of holding a child while he/she is having that test done, let me tell you, it is AWFUL. First, this test was administered during the height of Greta's stranger-anxiety phase. Second, Hal pricked her finger (ow) and then basically milked it for 4 or 5 minutes while he raked her finger against a test tube (double ow). Needless to say, she was screaming her brains out. I said, "Wow, you must hate having to give this test." And then Hal said, "It's usually not bad. Most kids are good during it." WHAAAAA? Seriously?? I find that very hard to believe, but whatever. Jerk.
There are quite a few labs around town, so needless to say, I never went back, and when G or I need blood drawn, we go to one down the street. That had been my last Hal slighting...until today.
I had to go get a bunch of shipping package thingies, so I decided to go to Wal-Mart to get them because I am an idiot cheapskate. I run in, get what I need, and run out. From a distance, I can see there are two men having a conversation next to my car. I get closer and I can see that one of them is actually SITTING ON MY CAR. Who does that?? And as I get even closer, I see it is Hal! Get out! He realizes he is sitting on the car of the person who is approaching it and makes some stupid little remark. I make a semi-snotty remark in return, and I get out of there as quickly as possible. I don't think he recognized me. Or if he did, he didn't say anything. But, what the heck? Why is this guy cursing me? Why???

Some nature all up in this piece

File under: nada mucho

When we moved to Brighton, I had no idea there'd be so much animal life. We're pretty close to the city, and I don't know, I just didn't expect to see so many critters. During the fall and winter, there was a roving pack of 8 or 10 turkeys. They were so funny. They would stop and eat for a bit and then all haul ass down the street in their little gang. And then during the winter we had a bunch of deer that would sleep in our backyard, and one day I looked out the front window and one was lazily walking past the window, maybe 5 feet from the house. It's sort of crazy for this city girl. (Yes, I know I grew up in farm country, but prior to October, I lived in the city for the last 12 years.)

With spring, we've had many geese and some ducks in the yard. Last week I got a couple good shots of some geese in the yard.

I am definitely loving Brighton.


Nada Mucho


I really can't think of anything very interesting to say, but it's been a while, so I am going to give this updating thing the old college try. I think bullets are in order.

  • I just finished reading Sarah's Key. It was super interesting, but the writing was pretty mediocre. It was a super fast read, though, and subject matter was interesting and important (the first half I kept having I-can't-believe-I-didn't-know-about-this feelings). The author is French, and she wrote from the point of view of an American journalist living in France, and I think there was a disconnect there. And as an editor, misplace modifiers and randomly placed commas really get my goat. It's a curse.
  • Since I finished my book club book in a week, I have plenty of time to read a book I've had on my night stand for a long time: Middlesex. I've heard nothing but good things about it. I am 80 pages in, and it is definitely very interesting AND well written. It is making me uncomfortable, though! This might be a long 500+ page book...
  • To answer the most-popular question I've been getting, work is good. Things are still pretty slow to start so far, but on Friday I got a big project that I can work on during any down time, and it's something I'm really interested in, so I'm actually excited for work tomorrow. Since I'm self-employed now, I just bought the Chicago Manual of Style (15th edition) with my own money. It was sort of liberating. It's my second-favorite style guide. J Nerd alert! I'm also working on landing a part-time freelance editing gig. Money-mo-mo-money! Money!
  • On the Greta front, things are good. One thing that seems particularly notable to me is that she was helping me with yard work today, and it actually felt like she was helping. Like, when she "helps" with things, it doesn't feel so much like help. But, today, I was making piles of dead leaves and she was grabbing it and putting it in the bag for me, and this went on for a good half an hour. She lost interest after that, but I think that was some sort of record. Yay for four.
  • Tonight the three of us went to Donuts Delite for the first time. I can't believe Pat and I have been in Rochester for 15 years and we've never been to Donuts Delite, but, anyway, it was okay. We can cross it off the list. We plan to go again in the AM sometime when the doughnuts are fresher, and then that will be the true test. Greta doesn't like doughnuts, but we ordered her one anyway. She refused to take a bite until right before we were leaving, and when she finally did, she made a face like she had just bit into a lemon. Such a strange child. Pat ordered a "white-cream filled," and the waitress brought him this. Apparently the only white-cream-filled doughnuts they had were in Cookie Monster's likeness. It's a good thing Pat is so secure in his manhood or he might have had to send it back.
  • In conclusion, Gene Simmons is on TV, and he looks like a caveman. He also seems like an amazing tool.


This girl has no idea how great her hair is

File under: greta | nada mucho

I hope she appreciates it some day.

Day 32: you're welcome

File under: nada mucho

I didn't take a single picture today. I could have taken a picture of Greta eating a wild berry Edy's Fruit Bar, where the purple popsicle was smudged around her lips like clown makeup on Heath Ledger as the Joker. But I didn't; you're welcome.

Day 31: boringness - delicious, salty boringness

To preface, I took no pictures today, so you get this...

Has anyone tried this Popcorn Salt? I got some in my stocking for Christmas (yes, I still get a stocking, even though I'm 33), and even though popcorn is one of my favorite snacks, I thought it seemed like a pretty pointless gimmick. But then I tried it. You only need a tiny bit, and it really does seem to "penetrate every kernel." Hehe.


Day 27: mustard-colored shoes and beige shag

Love 'em or hate 'em, this is one of my favorite pairs of shoes.

Greta made me take a picture of her favorite pair of shoes too. It's an action shot, of course, because she never stops moving.


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