I have today off...
...and the next day, and the next day, and the next day, and the next day...because I have recently joined the ranks of the 10% of Americans who are unemployed. I just found out yesterday. I apologize to my close friends and family if you're learning about this en masse, but I just hate talking about it, and even though I have suddenly found myself with more time on my hands, I feel like I'm in a dither and like I need to do 5 million things at once. So here's the update:
I am sad because I worked with so many great people and I am really going to miss them. I am actually holding it together pretty well, but there is one editor I worked with who was such a great mentor to me, and every time I think about how I won't be working with him anymore, I burst into tears.
I am embarrassed, and my pride is definitely bruised. One thing that makes me tick is I always want the people I work with to think I'm doing a good job. I hate the thought that anyone would think otherwise or that people who don't know the whole story will think less of me. I am definitely having an issue with the stigma of being laid off. (I survived a lot of rounds of layoffs at my previous employer, and I hoped it would never happen to me, but the way the economy is, it seems so common it is almost a rite of passage.) Ugh, and the thought of having to talk to certain people (you know, everyone has those one or two - or more - annoying people in their lives) about it makes me want to crawl under a rock.
I am annoyed that I need to update my resume, and try on my suit, and go on interview(s), and get settled into a new job with new coworkers. (And even though I am very thankful for unemployment benefits, I'm annoyed I need to figure out how to do that.)
I am scared, for obvious reasons.
I am humbled and in total shock that I completely agree with my company's decision. I fully support them and wish only the best for them. I would have thought I would be too stubborn to feel that way, much less admit it. But that is truly how I feel.
I am honored that so many of my coworkers expressed their kind and tearful support of me and that people have been coming out in droves to offer me emotional support and to write recommendations for me.
I am thankful that I have such a great family. I can't be too sad when Greta and Pat are with me. I told Greta that I wouldn't stay working at my old job and that I needed to find a new one. She said, "Oh no!" and then asked me a few questions about it. We got into a mini economics lesson, and her suggestion was that maybe they should start selling "princess stuff." Smart and funny, she is.
I am also thankful that I wasn't escorted out and that they gave me time yesterday and today to collect my things and thoughtfully organize and pass along my projects. It was also nice that so many people offered to help me with my things that I actually turned some away, and those who did help me made it so I didn't have to do the "walk of shame" to my car alone.
I am excited for the future. I think I have a pretty good chance of finding something similar in my field, but if I want to try something completely new, this is probably the perfect opportunity to do so. And I'm also excited to have some time to, like, paint my kitchen (sometimes it's the little things), and to ultimately have more time with Greta.
I am tired. I keep thinking this is just a nasty dream. Alas, it is not.
Fran
Comments
#1 Hey Fran
I'm so sorry about the news! I just know something even better will come your way. Hang in there, my friend! We'll be thinking of you & wishing you the best!!!
#2 Hi Jim - thanks so much for
Hi Jim - thanks so much for checking in and offering to look at my resume. It is much appreciated! I don't seem to have your email address, though. If you see this, could you email me at fran dot reed at gmail dot com or leave me your email address?
#3 That stinks...
Hey Fran, I'm so sorry to hear about losing your job. E-mail me your resume and information and I will see if I can find anything where I work.
Glad to see you are keeping busy.
Jim (from LMNK days)
#4 I'm sorry to hear about the
I'm sorry to hear about the job loss. I went through the same thing back in August, so I can really relate to how you are feeling.
Things will work out. Look at me, I was unemployed for 3 months and ended up finding a job that's closer to home and pays better. If I hadn't been laid off then I probably wouldn't have even known a better job was out there.
Best of luck in your new job search!
#5 So sorry...
Hey Fran-- I'm so sorry to hear about your job! I agree with everyone else-- this is just an open door to something even better!!! I'm going through a "change" at work as well where to the outside world it looks like I'm leaving a "glamorous" job and taking on a data entry type position, but what I'm really doing is taking a position that does not have TONS of mandatory overtime volunteer hours. I'm taking a position that won't keep me from my family nearly as much as the one I have now. Most people won't see this as the case, but even I -- who have always cared too much about what others think of me-- am getting past it and doing what's right for me! I think this is your opportunity too-- to do what is right for you!
#6 Franner, so sorry to hear
Franner, so sorry to hear about this. I do, however, believe that this is just a window for something better. You're brilliant and this is your chance to find something even better!
The universe is a funny place in these ways and I know you'll be okay. The day that I had an awful meeting at one of my jobs and was thinking about quitting, another one of my bosses offered me a full time job 30 minutes later which I accepted. While that is a very dramatic example of how these things play out, I'm sure you're going to end up on the good side of this one. AND... of course your suit will fit, that's just silly! I loves ya!
#7 Thank you!
Thank you all SO MUCH for the kind words and support. It really means so much to me. I should probably clarify that we aren't pulling Greta out of day care. I am hoping to be able to focus on my job search, and we want to keep her place at her current day care and not change her life/schedule too much. I am thinking of this as a short, temporary change (fingers crossed). I do look at this as an opportunity to spend more time with her in the sense that I won't need to spend time on the weekends cleaning and grocery shopping, etc, and can relax more with the fam.
Thank you, again. I really needed to hear it!
#8 I am so sorry Fran. Enjoy
I am so sorry Fran. Enjoy the downtime, even if not planned, and the next thing, a better thing, is just around the corner.
#9 oh jeez..Fran I'm really
oh jeez..Fran I'm really sorry to hear that. You do have the right attitude about it and I'm sure you will find something soon. I will keep my eyes and ears open to the Rochester crowd and let you know if I hear of anything.
#10 Aw Fran. I am so sorry to
Aw Fran. I am so sorry to hear your news! It makes me so terribly sad when bad things happen to good people(even sometimes when it can't be avoided). I am glad that you are looking at it positively because I know I would not be able to. And you neve know...something bigger and better might be just around the corner.
#11 Hang in there
I am so sorry this happened to you. Your courage and resilience are outstanding and you will get through this.
Both my husband and I have been through this routine in the last few years, and while it sucks at the time, one day it makes a great story. It is a modern rite of passage.
The best thing about being laid off is that it makes you consider opportunities you wouldn't have looked at before. In Bobby's case, that was starting his own business. In mine, I took a temp job which I would have considered a dead end before, but it's led to a really fantastic job which I love now.
Suggestion: You may prefer not to cancel your day care right away, firstly because it's really handy to have free time to write applications and go to job interviews, and secondly because if you do get a fantastic job offer, you don't want to have to run around trying to find another day care place at the last minute.
Great big hugs from the other end of the planet! You'll be right.
#12 Hey there Franny Pants, I
Hey there Franny Pants,
I understand the fear and the embarrassment which is no result whatsoever of your performance in your job. I was expecting it with my job but it still hit me like a ton of bricks. The good news is, you do have the support of wonderful husband and a killer attitude and resume and brain which will get you a great new job. I have all of the faith in the world in you. If you need anything at all, chica, I have been through the job search recently and am pretty up to speed on it. I even know all about Cobra nd the recent regulations that are in place to assist you should you not have benefits through Pat. They even gave us a course on updating our resumes and how to network. I really thought my resume was pretty kick butt until I took that course and realized it had a lot of room for improvement. It worked to get me a job in this crazy economic down turn. Anyway, I know we havent seen each other in a very long time, but I would be happy to help anyway I can.
#13 Been There
I too was where you are at at one point... except I was fired, not laid off... and I was escorted out of my office in the whole walk of shame thing... and my co-workers were not only NOT supportive, but I later found out that one of them got me fired... and they denied me my unemployment benefits, which I took them to court to get them back, and they won and I was left with nothing. I was so bitter that I decided I was going to ruin the wedding of the co-worker that got me fired whom was to be married the following month. I ran it by you who in turn told me, "Johnathan Vienneau, a wedding is the most important day in a woman's life. If I found out that you ruined it for her, I would hate you for life"(or something like that). Not wanting to be hated for life by you, I scraped my plan and tried to think of other things I could do to her to get even. It consumed me for a long time. My point? Your taking this very well, and I wish I had half of your attitude when I lost my job. Good for you!
PS- I never did do anything to get even with her, just incase your wondering.
#14 Sorry...
Sorry Fran about the crappy news. I feel real bad especially when it's a surprise and didn't have any idea the layoff was coming. The bright side, more time at home with your beautiful daughter and no daycare expense!
#15 P'n'F
is not how I heard about this change in your lives. Your mom told me earlier today. So I was debating calling or e-mailing or something. Now that it's out here, I can tell you that I truly believe things will work out fine for you. You seem to have the proper outlook as you frame this as an opportunity. You are uniquely talented and will at some point find something that is a good fit for you. Until then, time with Greta and Pat and your other pursuits will be good. It is heartening to know that your co-workers had such respect and admiration for you. Get some rest and act like Scarlet O'Hara - think about things tomorrow, even if tomorrow is some time away. Uncle Mike and I are thinking of all of you!
#16 Awh, franny...wish I could
Awh, franny...wish I could give you a big hug right now. I think you are looking at this in all the right ways. I wish I'd taken my lay off as well as you are...you rock.
#17 Sorry to hear it
Hi Fran; so sorry to hear the news! They did a round of layoffs where I work last fall and it was the most stressful thing ever, for the people who got laid off and the people who didn't. You're right to look at it as an opportunity, though, to keep doing what you do or try something new. Either way I'm sure you'll find something great!
#18 Sorry to hear your news,
Sorry to hear your news, Fran. It is hard to be laid off. I was last year and was so disappointed. I knew just like you that it wasn't my work ethic but budget cuts but I still was very upset!! You're in my thoughts!! Jennifer
PS Greta's hair is so long and pretty:) I know two people that will cheer you up though!! I know Brad and Paige did help me through:)
#19 Aw, Fran, I know how you
Aw, Fran, I know how you feel. Sorry to hear about it! You are smart and funny though, so I think you have a pretty good chance of finding something super awesome.
#20 You forgot that ...
You are brave.
For putting all this out there on the blogosphere. You wrote your feelings so eloquently and truthfully.
And you are brave for being resilient. You may not feel like you are, but I think you will prove me right. I've got a good feeling about that.
I'll skip all the trite BS that I want to say, since I'm sure you've heard it and it won't make a lick of difference (been there, felt that).
I think Greta lucked out in this deal!
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