After submitting this photo to Fail Blog I thought was a shoo-in for making their home page that never made the cut (even though it got phenomenal ratings from people in their voting section [I swear I'm barely still bitter, even though THEY ARE DEAD TO ME]), I was feeling a little nervous about putting myself out there again on the www. But I enjoy The "Blog" of "Unnecessary" Quotation Marks, and there is a sign on a building my favorite Korean restaurant is in that I just had to document and submit to the site. I got the good news yesterday that my image made the site! I am so honored. I love the myriad issues with this sign.
I would like to thank my parents for "supporting" me through college, where I "learned" how to recognize a "good" photo op when I saw it. I would like to thank Pat Reed for "buying" me an iPhone for Christmas, without which this sign would never have been documented, because I "never" think to bring a camera otherwise. I would like to thank Young's for being "delicious" and for being in the low-budget "plaza" next to the "You Never" Know? store. And, finally, I would like to thank TBoUQM for recognizing "greatness" (unlike those snobs over at FB).
Sorry for the recent radio silence. The last week has been more than a little annoying. Greta came down with a rather unpleasant cold, and she was out of day care more than she was in it. I then got said rather unpleasant cold. Job-searching productivity down the tubes. Then we got slammed with snow. Blah, blah. Then our Internet was out most of the last two and a half days.
I spent a couple hours yesterday morning at an internet cafe Panera, and then I decided that was for the birds. After you've gotten used to a cushy corner office, you can't sit at some table with dried who-knows-what on it from who-knows-when while you try to fight the overwhelming urge to pee because if you went to pee you'd either have to leave your laptop with your entire life on it out in a public place or take it into the bathroom (ew) and risk losing your food-crusted table while you're hopped up on coffee you didn't want to buy in the first place. And since the one and only positive thing that popped into my mind as I was sitting at a table with tears in my eyes, getting told I was being laid off, was that I would now I have time to paint my kitchen, I decided to paint my kitchen! I painted the ceiling yesterday and then put a coat of paint on the walls. So far it seems to be a tricky color and may need a few coats, but I will be sure to post pictures when the new kitchen is ready for its unveiling.
What else? As I mentioned, I haven't been very productive about the job search this past week. I will say that there are a couple solid tentative plans in the works, so I am not feeling super stressed right now. I have a lot of good people looking out for me, so I know this is temporary and that I need to enjoy this first break I have had from work since I started working at 15. I know it will be over in the blink of an eye (in the grand scheme of things). I will say the feelings associated with being unemployed are still...unpleasant. I went from saying, "I was laid off last week." to "I was laid off earlier this month." to now needing to say, "I was laid off last month." (Stupid short February.) I know why, but that has been a hard transition in my brain.
One more thing. It's almost that time of year again! Greta will be turning four later this month, and we're having two small parties this year so we made two invites. We took many pictures of Greta and luckily got two good ones. I thought people might enjoy some of the outtakes.
This is my personal favorite. Supastar!
Cutsie Tootsie
It was so unusually sunny we were stumped. Most of the pictures were waaay overexposed. Oh, she is doing "karate moves" here.
Hi, all. This has been an interesting week indeed. It has been a week and a day since I was laid off, and I can't believe how quickly the time has gone by. I don't feel like I've made a big dent in Operation Find a Job that Doesn't Suck, but I have been making progress. It is amazing how much time I can spend tweaking my resume or on a probably fruitless endeavor such as searching for job postings on Monster or the like. Anyone who doesn't think finding a job is a full-time job is obviously not trying hard enough - or they're more marketable than me.
For the most part, I've been in very good spirits. It is exciting to look at my updated resume and see how much I've grown over the last few years, but yesterday I spent the majority of my day searching every site I could think of that lists job postings, and by the end of the day I felt deflated - very deflated. Things seem more promising today, after talking to one woman I used to work with who might have a lead on a job I am legitimately excited about. I haven't brought myself to actually apply for anything yet. I honestly haven't seen anything tangible I could fathom doing for 40-some hours a week. I am a picky girl, and over the last three years editing content I found extremely interesting, I got spoiled. One thing I can say with certainty is this: there are a lot of crappy jobs out there.
Not having a real income will not allow for me to get too comfortable, but I am finding joy in being home all day (and even in being unemployed).
+ This is my new "office." It is a corner office with windows! And every day is bring-your-pet-to-work day! And with the book case right behind me, a copy of The Unabridged Journals of Sylvia Plath is never more than an arm's reach away, in case I need to feel like I'm at least doing better than SP.
+ I can make foods for lunch I wouldn't bother attempting to make at the office. This took me about a minute and a half to make, but I wouldn't have made it if I had to pack up the fixin's and assemble and prepare them at work.
+ No one will let me buy anything because they feel sorry for my poor soul. Two people have bought me lunch this week, and although I am so not a mooch and it pains me to let people buy me stuff, it is very nice. And I like food. And food you don't have to make or buy is pretty awesome. So is lunch with friends. And it's just a really nice gesture. You get the picture.
+ I can listen to This American Life and music without headphones, but, really I haven't felt the need. I really love quiet. I can totally deal with a somewhat noisy office setting, but quiet - sweet, sweet quiet - is divine. It is nice not to have to try to drown out any type of chatter.
+ I have talked to a lot of people I haven't talked to in ages, and I've talked to former coworkers on a more personal level than I have before. I have been in contact with so many people this week that it is amazing and even overwhelming to me. Yesterday, a former coworker called to say she missed me and that she "needed to talk to my Fran," and it was just nice to feel valued like that. It has also been nice to catch up with old, old coworkers and see what they're up to at new jobs, even if it doesn't lead to anything.
+ I can do laundry during the day. This has been a dream of mine for quite some time.
Happy Friday, peoples. I hope you had a nice week and that you have a salubrious weekend.
Thursday, after the most bizarre work experience of my life, and after I sat on the couch drinking diet Coke and watching Dr. Phil in a complete daze, I met up with Pat and we walked over to the photo building for Greta's art show premiere. I avoided crying in front of any of the students and parents, and we enjoyed looking at the preschoolers' artwork. The kids in Greta's class made artwork inspired by Leo Lionni books. Look how cute!
After the art show, we went back home, and there was a very exciting package for Greta. Pat had ordered her a pink electric guitar and amplifier. This may not seem especially interesting on the surface, but it seems notable to me, because maybe 20 minutes after we found out I was pregnant and Pat and I got over the initial OMG-we're-having-a-baby! excitement, the first thing Pat said was, "I need to start thinking about what kind of guitar to buy the baby." I suggested he wait a little while since she was pretty much a zygote. Since that conversation, Pat has spent quite a bit of time researching guitars for kids, weighing the options, and he finally settled on the perfect one. Greta loves her new guitar, and it matches all of her outfits perfectly. :)
Friday evening, we headed over to NTID for a contemporary dance performance of Sleeping Beauty. Our good friend Amy was one of the dancers, and we knew Greta would love seeing Amy perform AND see one of her favorite princess stories set to dance. It was really fun, and Greta hasn't stopped talking about how cool Amy is since.
Saturday we lazed around a lot. The big thing is after Greta went to bed, Pat and I cooked our annual Valentine's dinner. Given my employment predicament, the menu probably should have consisted of hobo beans, but we splurged for organic beef tenderloin, sautéed mushrooms, beet and warm goat cheese salad, good bread, and we opened a nice bottle of wine from our collection. The food was great, and we watched a romcom we both actually liked (500 Days of Summer), and we just generally had a nice night. We ended up waiting to have our dessert until today, since we were way too full to eat it, but I made chocolate soufflé. I am still far from mastering soufflé, but at least this time I made it the soufflé did rise (the only other time I attempted soufflé it came out flat as a pancake). No pictures. I was too busy eating.
What else? I am feeling much better about the whole getting-laid-off thing as of today. Other than my freshman year in college, I've had a regular job since I turned 15. I am staying positive about finding something else I'll enjoy doing (or like even better!), and, meantime, I'm determined to enjoy my mini temporary retirement. I'm looking forward to the challenge, including finding ways to save money, and living off the land and my wits and riding the rails (well, okay, maybe not that last part).
...and the next day, and the next day, and the next day, and the next day...because I have recently joined the ranks of the 10% of Americans who are unemployed. I just found out yesterday. I apologize to my close friends and family if you're learning about this en masse, but I just hate talking about it, and even though I have suddenly found myself with more time on my hands, I feel like I'm in a dither and like I need to do 5 million things at once. So here's the update:
I am sad because I worked with so many great people and I am really going to miss them. I am actually holding it together pretty well, but there is one editor I worked with who was such a great mentor to me, and every time I think about how I won't be working with him anymore, I burst into tears.
I am embarrassed, and my pride is definitely bruised. One thing that makes me tick is I always want the people I work with to think I'm doing a good job. I hate the thought that anyone would think otherwise or that people who don't know the whole story will think less of me. I am definitely having an issue with the stigma of being laid off. (I survived a lot of rounds of layoffs at my previous employer, and I hoped it would never happen to me, but the way the economy is, it seems so common it is almost a rite of passage.) Ugh, and the thought of having to talk to certain people (you know, everyone has those one or two - or more - annoying people in their lives) about it makes me want to crawl under a rock.
I am annoyed that I need to update my resume, and try on my suit, and go on interview(s), and get settled into a new job with new coworkers. (And even though I am very thankful for unemployment benefits, I'm annoyed I need to figure out how to do that.)
I am scared, for obvious reasons.
I am humbled and in total shock that I completely agree with my company's decision. I fully support them and wish only the best for them. I would have thought I would be too stubborn to feel that way, much less admit it. But that is truly how I feel.
I am honored that so many of my coworkers expressed their kind and tearful support of me and that people have been coming out in droves to offer me emotional support and to write recommendations for me.
I am thankful that I have such a great family. I can't be too sad when Greta and Pat are with me. I told Greta that I wouldn't stay working at my old job and that I needed to find a new one. She said, "Oh no!" and then asked me a few questions about it. We got into a mini economics lesson, and her suggestion was that maybe they should start selling "princess stuff." Smart and funny, she is.
I am also thankful that I wasn't escorted out and that they gave me time yesterday and today to collect my things and thoughtfully organize and pass along my projects. It was also nice that so many people offered to help me with my things that I actually turned some away, and those who did help me made it so I didn't have to do the "walk of shame" to my car alone.
I am excited for the future. I think I have a pretty good chance of finding something similar in my field, but if I want to try something completely new, this is probably the perfect opportunity to do so. And I'm also excited to have some time to, like, paint my kitchen (sometimes it's the little things), and to ultimately have more time with Greta.
I am tired. I keep thinking this is just a nasty dream. Alas, it is not.
At the moment, it looks like Saint Valentine himself threw up on our living room.
I tried to step things up a notch from last year. I got my ideas for this year's valentines from here and here. For the teachers, I got these super cute travel cups. Now I sort of wish I had gotten one for myself.
I couldn't care less about Valentine's Day, but I do love making valentines. It gives me a chance to put my very expensive art degree to use. Ahhh, just what my parents had in mind, I'm sure.
Speaking of the art, the kids from Greta's day care are going to have an art opening tomorrow night on RIT campus. The name of the show is "Little Artists Make it Big." I CAN'T WAIT. I am so excited for Greta's first art opening. I'm sure it will be many for our little future artist-doctor-musician. (What? I have high expectations for our little girl. Is that so wrong?)
Greta continues to bring cool artwork home from school. Recently they were learning all about pengins, and Greta brought this home. I love it! In case you can't tell, it's a pine cone with a shredded cotton ball sort of wrapped around it, and then of course the face and the soup cup igloo. So creative.
She also brought this home earlier this month. Can you guess what it is? Hint: It came home on February 2nd.
Speaking of high expectations, sometimes I think they have some sort of smarty-pants-making plan in the works for the kids at day care. As I've discussed previously, sometimes they get scrap paper for the kids to draw on, and recently we've been getting drawings on information like this:
If Greta becomes a artist-renologist-musician, then I'll know who likely deserves credit.
